Atma-Shatakam - by Adi Shankara (Shivoham)

Nov 20 2008

A few months back, as I sat meditating one day, after something that happened that caused me to feel very disturbed... I watched how "I" dissolved when I meditated, and yet every time I went back into thoughts.. the "I" started rising like flames of a fire.

I began to play with this.. brought back the thoughts and "I", as a daughter, mother, wife grew stronger.. when I relaxed back into the bliss of meditation.. "I" dissolved.. I was not a mother or daughter or wife.

The need to protect my image dissolved.. the need to protect my place as a daughter, as a mother, as a wife did not exist.. and yet when I brought back my thoughts.. like adding fuel to fire.. "I" came roaring back.. the more thoughts I added.. the more defined "I" became. The more there was a sense of "me" and "mine",  the more "I" existed, the more protection "I" needed, the more "I" wanted, the more hurt there was,  so much energy went into keeping the "I" in place....

...and once again I immersed in letting go the thoughts and dissolve in meditation.. the "I" vanished. It was an amazing experience.. to see how my thoughts keep "me" in place.

Since then this song has become very meaningful to me. I listen to it very often.. and anytime I go into feeling any kind of discomfort.. I watch the "I" grow.. and I sing this song:

I am not the mind, intellect, thought, ego, or a supreme being.
I myself am the joy of pure consciousness I am Shiva (the silence).


I am not the air (prana) nor a part of essential five gases (pancha vayuhu) nor the seven-fold material (sapta dhatur), I am not part of five coverings (pancha koshaha) that help to build up the personality. Nor am I the five organs of action.
I myself am the joy of pure consciousness I am Shiva (the silence).


I am not attached to any punya (righteousness) or paapa (sin); I have neither pleasure (sukhya) nor sorrow (dukham); I don't need Mantra or pilgrimages (tirtham) or  sacred scriptures (veda) or sacrifice or rituals (yagnaha); I am neither the meal (bhojanam) nor the one who consumes (bhojyam) or what is consumed (bhokta);
I myself am the joy of pure consciousness I am Shiva (the silence).


I do not need  Dharma (Law of Life), Artha (Wealth), Kama (Desires) and Moksha (Liberation). I have no fear of death, nor do I have caste distinctions; I am neither a father (pita) nor a mother (maata).. I was never born; I am neither kin/relatives (bandhu). nor friend (mitram); I am not a guru and nor am I a disciple (shishya).
I myself am the joy of pure consciousness I am Shiva (the silence).

I am free of thoughts and beyond imagination (nirvikalpo) since I have no form (nirakara rupo);
I myself am the joy of pure consciousness I am Shiva (the silence).

I would like to share the song that helps dissolve "me" ..  If you have a few mins please do listen to the song... not only are the lyrics beautiful.. but you can really feel the shraddha (devotion) in her voice and the vibrations of the Sanskrit words dissolving you.

This is the version of the song I listen to: its called ATMASTAKAM from the album Chant of Shiva or more popularly known as Shivoham Shivoham ... it makes me melt into nothing when the "I" gets strong..


A more western version of the same song:
DEVA PREMAL - SHIVOHAM SHIVOHAM

Here are the Sanskrit words to the song (in red) and the English translations (in blue)

Mano buddhya-hankara chittani naham
Na cha shrotra jihve, na cha ghrana netre
Na cha vyoma bhumirna tejo na vayuhu
Chidananda rupah shivoham shivoham . (1)

I am not the mind, intellect, thought, ego, or some form of the supreme being; I neither have ears, nor tongue and I neither have nose (nostrils) nor eyes; I am not the sky, earth, light or the wind; I am the fortunate, joyful, supreme being who is the very emblem of truth, knowledge and eternal bliss.
I am consciousness and bliss. I am Shiva, I am Shiva.

Na cha prana sangno na vai pancha vayuhu
Na va sapta dhatur na va pancha koshaha
Na vak pani padau na chopastha payoo
Chidananda rupah shivoham shivoham .(2).

I am not the most essential air that everyone breathes. Nor a part of essential five gases related to bodily functions (which are Prana, Aparna, Vyana, Udana and Samana). I am not the seven-fold material (Rasa, Rakta, Mamsa, Medas, Asthi,Majja and Shukra) that help in body's physical development, I am not part of five coverings that help to build up the personality (food, air, mind, knowledge or wisdom and pleasure). Nor am I the five organs of action (which are speech/mouth, hands, feet, reproductive and rectum), I am the fortunate, joyful, supreme being who is the very emblem of truth, knowledge and eternal bliss.

I am consciousness and bliss. I am Shiva, I am Shiva.

Na me dvesha ragau na me lobha mohau

Mado naiva me naiva matsarya bhavah

Na dharmo na chartho na kamo na mokshah

Chidananda rupah shivoham shivoham .(3).

I have no likes or dislikes; Not I have any greed or delusion; I have no pride or arrogant vanity; Nor am I jealous of anyone or in competition with anyone ; I do not need the four main necessities of life (which are Dharma (Law of Life), Artha (Wealth), Kama (Desires) and Moksha (Liberation); I am the fortunate, joyful,supreme being who is the very emblem of truth, knowledge and eternal bliss.

I am consciousness and bliss. I am Shiva, I am Shiva.

Na punyam na papam na saukhyam na dukham

Na mantro na tirtham na veda na yagnaha

Aham bhojanam naiva bhojyam na bhokta

Chidananda rupah shivoham shivoham .(4).

I am not attached to any righteousness or sin; I have neither pleasure nor sorrow; I have no need for any Mantra; I have no need for pilgrimages ; I have no need for any sacred scriptures; nor do I perform any sacrifise or rituals; I am neither the meal nor the one who consumes or what is consumed;

I am the fortunate, joyful,supreme being who is the very emblem of truth, knowledge and eternal bliss.
I am consciousness and bliss. I am Shiva, I am Shiva.

Na me mrutyu shanka na me jati bhedah

Pita naiva me naiva mata na janma

Na bandhur na mitram gurur naiva shishyah

Chidananda rupah shivoham shivoham .(5).

I have no fear of death, nor do I have caste distinctions; I neither have a father nor mother because I was never born; I have neither kin/relatives nor friends; I have no gurus and nor am I a disciple; I am the fortunate, joyful, supreme being who is the very emblem of truth, knowledge and eternal bliss.
I am consciousness and bliss. I am Shiva, I am Shiva.

Aham nirvikalpo nirakara rupo

Vibhur vyapya sarvatra sarvendriyanam

Sada me samatvam na muktir na bandhah

Chidananda rupah shivoham shivoham .(6).

I am free of thoughts and beyond imagination since I have no form; I am all pervading and exist everywhere; I am the king of all sense-organs; I am always impartial to everything and everyone,; I am free from everything and I have no attachment to anything; I am the fortunate, joyful, supreme being who is the very emblem of truth, knowledge and eternal bliss.

I am consciousness and bliss. I am Shiva, I am Shiva.